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Yesterday was my last day of having someone test my balance and endurance. It was a very hot but rewarding walk to make it through the field to the gym using a single walking stick in the company of someone watching over me. I might go to tai chi tomorrow but will drive if the heat stays near ninety.

Last night was my first night out. A fund raising music event with two neighbors singing in the choir. Beautiful voices. I watched a middle-aged man in the men’s section and thought his voice quite pleasing. So I told my friend who took me there, that he would be nice to take home, sit him in the dining (they are too loud when they stand) and have him sing as I went about my chores and studio work. By the end I changed my mind. It was enough. I also was interested in the fit of the slacks/pants of the various conductors. Lots of wrinkles gathered under the buttocks with a tuck up high in the thigh, then smooth-ish until the back of the knee where they cascade in wrinkles to the heel. I would think black robes would be a good idea when they take to the elevated stand with backs to the audience. Or I should just enjoy the music and keep my mind on that!

This drawing took me two days to complete. I was following what basketmaking friends in Tasmania were posting and how they were spending their time together. Seemed to be lots of cut cloth (mostly wool blankets) being coiled around firm bases of wood and shell.

I liked having pencils in my hands and trying to get what is in my head down on the page.

I will return to stitched cloth when I turn the page.

And two days ago this delightful original print arrived from Patsy in Australia. She sent me her dragon a couple of months ago. I love her work!

I found a frame this morning that was in my new storage cabinets in the garage. Now it is hung not too far away from the dragon in the dining area.

Later this afternoon I will go back into town to watch a movie with MJ and a couple of the guys. I will need to be back here for the family call at seven.

Today was my very last physical with my doctor of over thirty years. She checked all that needed looked over and has given me a good bill of health. We ended by settling on the doctor I wanted to take over the responsibility of poking and prodding come next year. It will be a young man with a nice smile and a sense of humor. I doubt he will have to do it for the next thirty years but we can make a start.

Not much else new. Just getting better each day.

Til later….

I ordered these five pound weights on advice from one of the physical therapist. Then I removed two pounds from each one to make them more usable for where I am now. Shoulders, arms and legs can get a better workout with these. With the addition of the stretch bands they gave me, I am getting some good workouts. Plus the fellows have started me walking on the road, but only with them and a walking stick so far. I go a bit further each time.

The six way book has a new drawing/painting. The Wooly Mullein.

One of the therapists told me that Native Americans used to collect the seeds and once a year toss them in the water to drive the fish to the surface. Then they could catch enough to process for winter. Interesting. As a kid, I always liked this weed. It seemed impossible to kill and the feel of those lovely soft, fuzzy leaves was delightful. Speaking of weeds, my yardman is coming the following week to help rid my yard of those taking advantage of my weakness. That and to clean out my pond…algae is clogging the little pump.

I took the black bench off the front entryway, painted it with a color that matches the cedar pergola and will wait until someone stronger comes by and ask them to put it outside under the living room windows. I might put some pots on it come Spring. But for now it will just be waiting outside in the weather.

More phyllo pastries with cheeses, ham and spinach were needed. They make a good meal when effort is too elusive. Most of them are now waiting in the freezer.

The cats are such good companions and will move to whatever room I am in.

I went to my first poetry critique this past Thursday and read the latest poem. This one has inspired me to slowly work on a book to be titled, Brevity. Short pieces that are centered on spacious pages. When I wrote this one, it came all at once with no thinking or planning. I loved how those who might have witnessed this woman could take comfort in her easy passing and perhaps their own one day.

 

Her Last Breath

 

When she drew her last breath,

   it came with the smell

   of strawberries.

 

She closed her lips and smiled

   as she savored

   the last one.

 

And this one from a couple weeks ago. Definitely more autobiographical.

 

There is a Door      

 

There is a door

that doesn’t want to close.

 

I know this because it bounces

back from the door jamb

whenever I pass through.

 

Whatever is behind me

wants to follow, tap my shoulder,

and say, “Don’t forget me.”

 

I pause and say,

“What?”

“What do I need to remember?”

 

But the door just hangs there

on its hinges waiting until I return,

to gently pull it closed.

 

It drags its feet across the threshold,

sighing at my determination

to shut a door behind me.

 

Humidity and heat are slowing me down. I can’t wait until the cooler days of Fall.

In the meantime I write and build my body strength back to what it was two months ago…maybe better!

Til later….

Some say it will take a couple of months to come back from pneumonia. Others remind me it may not return to the degree it was before. All I know is I get tired just doing nothing. I have a week or two left of physical therapy here at home. There are new exercises based on balance.  I miss walking around the neighborhood and stopping in for a glass of wine and a visit. So here I am with a glass of red and my blog for a chat.

I worry that if I don’t keep drawing and painting in my sketchbooks, I might lose that as well. So I have kept at it and try not to notice if the new pages are a bit slack compared to earlier ones.

Nineteen more single pages before this one sixth of the book is filled. I think bugs will be fun to do in the opposite-opening one sixth.  I must have had such high ambitions for myself when Gian Frontini showed me this binding. He used much heavier paper in his sample. I must say my ambitions for myself have floundered some.

I was at a consistent 10,000 steps per day and now am struggling to get in 2,000. I told myself that next week I will raise that daily goal to 3,000. Seems unlikely to reach that this afternoon….maybe the week after.

One of the toughest balance exercises is holding onto the counter, standing on one foot, letting go and counting to five. Doing five reps of that on each foot. the left leg up is quite cooperative…the right is not getting the message. Good thing it is done with the counter in arm’s reach.

With all the sorting and storing of things I thought it was necessary to haul to here, I did come up with a new drawing for the Philosophical Considerations Book.

Wish I knew then what I know now. So much tagged along that is not the least bit interesting and doesn’t even bother to call my name. Once I finish taking a good hard look, I will decide whether to find new homes or just toss out.

I hope to make it to the first poetry meeting in a couple of months this coming Thursday. Maybe this week I can get some new writing done. I don’t want the writing tarnished with tiredness and fighting off the desire to just take a nap.

Still working on my latest short story. I don’t write sci-fi or fantasy. I don’t have the brain for it. But I was wondering about a character in a story that might be having difficulty adjusting to new surroundings, and just suppose while standing in front of a window near sunset, the shadow of a tree came through and was closely aligned with her shadow…both inside the house. What if out of curiosity she adjusted her shadow to slip within the tree’s shadow? What if she stayed there until released by the morning sun coming in the window behind her?

Now if you find that a bit odd, imagine me trying to explain it to the mayor while we were having coffee the other day by using my coffee mug and IPhone to set the stage. He smiled and said something like, “Interesting.”

I think that is what I miss most…having someone to talk about art with and story possibilities with. I miss my tribe. The students who eagerly stepped aboard knowing they were in the safest place to explore all the passions not easily shared. I miss them terribly.

I look at all the workshops offered online and wonder if those students have found expression there. I think not. Mostly it is advertised as finding your own voice, but in reality, I suspect most of the work is similar…using the same tools and materials and marks. And all the while the makers wondering how it will look published or on a buyer’s wall. What really makes one student’s work different from the next?

Years ago I had a student at a local folk school who expressed her personal travels and stories by cutting her finger just a little each evening to mark her personal journey on a map that covered an entire wall by the time we got to “show and tell” at the end of the week. I and her fellow students loved how she took this opportunity to put into a visual form all that she had felt…not so much those who wanted to see product, a table full of product. Do you think we will ever see enough of “product”

BUT, I do keep in mind what the dearest of friends told me many years ago, “Sandy, some of us just want to make stuff.” And so they should.

Til later….

While Patrick was here we enjoyed not only Marla’s gift of Four Pillars from the Australia distillery but Chemist from here in North Carolina. The tonic has made all the difference. Not to mention the cucumber…so thank you to the Aussies who put me on the right track.

I am enjoying one right now after an afternoon nap.

Here is my garage now on the side I will have the things I think I might need. Still some tossing to do but I did say goodbye to my drill press and old Dyson vacuum, shelves, working stool from the studio, and garage refrigerator. Now all off to Patrick’s and Amy’s.

It was a fast four days and very productive. Of course I thought I would just go into the garage and finish it off on Monday. Here it is Saturday and not the energy for it yet. Maybe this next week.

It took a bit over two weeks for my taste to return. The thing that jump-started my taste and smell was the dozen eggs a friend brought me. Totally thick and orange yolks! The kind we are served constantly in Australia. So rich and delicious! I only have two left. When Patrick went to the store to get more, he found they were priced close to $10 per dozen and settled for some free range eggs at about half that price. I see it as six very good meals per dozen eggs. And am using the other ones he picked out for cooking.

I had a taste for bonetsy, an eastern European cheese dish that an older sister’s mother-in-law taught us as kids to make from scratch. It started with a day of making phyllo dough by hand and then capturing air and butter in the pockets filled with a cheese filling. The kitchen was a mess of butter going everywhere.

When talking to Amy on the family call last week, she said she had my adapted recipe. It seems I sent her a book of favorite recipes when she went off to college. Smart mother! Clever daughter to hang on to it. By then we could buy phyllo in frozen sheets, so it was much easier.

After making several with just the cheese mixture of cottage, feta and parmesan with egg, I made more adding in cut up ham and spinach. Both have been a quick and easy meal when not eating eggs.

The same elderly mother-in-law, Mom Slodinski, taught us how to make her version of perogis, a homemade noodle-type dough that held two large pitted sweet black cherries before being sealed tight and boiled. Then dried and fried in butter (of course) before being slathered in sour cream.  Anyway I have put some of the bonetsy in the freezer for later.

Now all I can think of is how much I would love a taco salad! It will be one of the first things I order to bring home when I start driving again. For now I am lucky to get to the corner to spend time listening to the guys. I only made it once this past week and it took all the energy I had. But I am getting better!

My physical therapist said I could probably stop with his visits to put me through my paces after this week. I do every exercise on the sheet to strengthen knees and legs and then hit a balloon back and forth with him making sure I can keep my balance. I could go back to the gym next week but likely only to do a shortened time on the bike. He said my body will tell me when to stop. Now I am taking a couple of naps a day and at least eight to ten hours of sleep each night.

The cats never leave my side.

Neighbors still checking on me and offering help. I am very lucky to live here.

So that is all the news…wish it was more exciting. I have not been drawing or writing which feels sad, but I will get back to it soon.

Til later….